Don't let your past freeze your heart

The past.

It can freeze your heart.

If you carry too much of your past into your future.......It could stop things from happening.

Don't let your past freeze your heart.

Your past can suffocate you.

It can debilitate you.

It can leave you terrified......frozen.

Take the lessons from your past with you always. Let those lessons make you wiser, kinder, more compassionate, and super aware.

Don't take the past with you in your heart and let it block you from moving forward.

If you've been torn down by love? Leave that love in the past. Take with you from it what you must but leave the bad stuff behind. If you don't? You'll always be living in fear. Fear of getting your heart broken again.

My husband left. He left with no goodbye letter, no romantic "I'll love you till the end of time" whisper in my ear, no explanation. And I still choose to open up my shattered heart and put myself out there in my life.....again. I choose not to think that every single man after him is going to do to me what he did. Maybe they will leave. Maybe they will shatter my heart and burn down my life and leave without a goodbye. But you know what? I'm not afraid. Nothing could hurt me in the same way again. Because of my tragedy I am cushioned a bit from the fear of getting hurt again. I know that life is so freaking beautiful and love is all there is. I will not live afraid because that's not real living. My poor and tired heart might crumble yet again but I will not let it become frozen by my past.

Unfreeze your heart.

You will survive it all.

Get out into your life after heartbreak without excuses. Sure, we all work too much. For some of us our careers are our life. That doesn't mean that we can't have a relationship with the right person who understands this fully and also lives this way. There aren't many hours or sometimes even minutes of my days that aren't taken up by kids, writing, grief work, creating my online classes and groups, monitoring my online grief groups, talking with grieving people via email/phone/text, and all of the work that goes into running a one parent household. I'm busy but I will carve out time for my personal life in any way that I can. I will drop plans to be with people that matter to me and never make excuses for why I can't find time for them in my life. I've cracked open my heart to fit it all in.

We all have emotional baggage. Don't take your baggage with you on the next flight to love. Leave it behind at the baggage claim. What one person did to you isn't what the next is going to do to you. You have to trust in this or you will never, ever have another love story. You have to trust in your own self that you are worthy of taking a chance and that if it all crumbles you will be ok.

Don't let your past freeze your heart.

Use those lessons you learned as a fire to light your way into your future.

I learned some really tough lessons when my husband died. I learned people can love you and they can still leave. I learned that nothing, nothing is matter's not guaranteed. I learned that life can end this afternoon. Poof. Gone. That person you needed to say something to.......gone. That Saturday night you had planned with them? Never gonna happen. That future you envisioned? Frozen in the past.

Because I learned these lessons in a really tough way.....I'm braver. I know fear when it tries to keep me living small and I kick it to the curb. I don't let it freeze my heart. I've seen death and because of that I want nothing less than to live my best life.

We must live for what today has to offer and not for what yesterday took away.

We must have hope.

We have to take a leap of trust.

Life is worth it.

Don't let your past make you cold.

Build a fire.

Accept your past with no regrets.

Handle your now with bravery.

And face your future with no fear.

Want to die with no regrets?

Unfreeze your heart.

#past #letitgo #noexcuses #secondfirsts


Copyright Nik Bonkoski 2020

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