Trauma healing is unfair.
It can feel so incredibly unfair when you have to heal from something that you didn't cause.
When you have to heal from something that wasn't your fault.
When you have to heal from something that someone else did to you...knowingly or unknowingly.....
Trauma healing is unfair.
It's unfair to have to spend years sweating in the middle of the night from the bad dreams that won't let go of your mind.
It's unfair to need to research therapy and ways to keep yourself alive.
It's unfair to have to find ways to simply get.....through....the.....day.
Day after day.
Year after year.
Trauma healing takes a lifetime.
And it can feel so incredibly unfair to have a nervous system that jumps at things other people don't seem to be afraid of.
Unfair......to feel the survival need to avoid...avoid...avoid certain locations and places and faces.
Unfair to want to simply live your life out in the sunshine and follow your dreams when you have something in your backpack that you have to forever....unpack and heal, unpack and heal.....
unpack and heal.
Unfair to have to put your feet to the hiking trail for endless miles....thousands of miles.... to calm your nervous system long after you have healed your grief.
And yet, dear ones.
We keep living.
We keep going.
We find the others like us so we don't feel alone.
We understand while yes, this is so completely unfair to have to spend our lifetimes healing from something..... we are somehow equipped to do so. Deep down in our souls is a spark of light that carries us through and helps us to know that we will thrive through this, we will thrive. We will keep going. We will somehow....overcome.
Yes, it's so unfair.
But you don't have to go through it all alone. Find the others who have endured the trauma that you have endured. Take yourself out into nature and let the sunshine heal your heart and calm your soul.
Healing is a journey and you are not alone on that journey. I'm here and I care about you. YOU, who feels alone in the dark. My heart is with you today. Reach out and I'll always reach back in. For going on 8 years I have answered every single one of your "Dear Nik" letters from around the globe. Your story is safe in my heart. You matter to me because I've been there.
I'll never leave you to row the boat alone. Many would have given up on this writing journey that I am on but I'm still here....for you. Reach out, dear friend. You are loved.
Always, Nik
I am Nikki Bonkoski on Facebook. Come, follow along.
My free-of-charge support groups that I have hosted on FB for almost 7 years:
Grief Untamed: support for all death related grief
Manhood Untamed: Men's mental health support.
The Brave Ladies Club: Support for women who had a spouse/partner die by suicide
Leave me a tip to say 'thank you' for my writing if it helps your heart. God bless you! Your loving support helps me keep my writing and loving ministry 100% online so it is free and accessible to everyone. www.paypal.me/niktebbe https://venmo.com/nikki-bonkoski Cash app: Nikki Bonkoski If you would like to mail something to me: Donation, card, book, or other...you can email me for my private address. niktebbe@gmail.com